Feel the Jolt.
Forum Jobs Marketplace Food Guide Ride Board Procrastination Events Calendar $$$ for College
AC Homepage Getting Around Movies TV Blackboard Outlook Webmail Planworld Shops & Services Course Reviews

Make my homepage!
Customize | Login


Friday, May 16
Mostly Cloudy
56° F

tomorrow:
Chance Rain Showers,   64°/45° more...


Promoting an event?
We can help.

More info...

Halloween Contest 2007: Win a trip to Cancun, or an iPod Nano!...

Today's Crossword

Start of the Year
Orientation Info
Should I pack a...?
5 Col Course Guide
PVTA Schedule (pdf)

Features
Amherst Pictures
Menu Alerts
Forum Hotlist
Valentine Recipes

When is it Open?
Libraries
Athletic Facilities
Campus Center
Computer Center
Health Services
Valentine

Calendars & Schedules
College Calendar
Concert Calendar
Theater Calendar
Area Concerts
WAMH Programming

Handy Links
Campus Directory
Blackboard
Campus Map
Dorm Floorplans
5 Col Course Guide
Grades
Course Catalog and Scheduler

Get Help!
Career Center
Computers & Tel.
Quan. Skills Center
Writing Center
Ask the Library

The News Rack
New York Times
The Onion
ESPN
FARK
MassLive Local News
Amherst Magazine
Amherst Student
The Indicator
The Amherst Hamster

Old Features
Thing All Amherst Students Need to do Once

 
Bike Week May 10 - 18
This week is Pioneer Valley Bike to Work Week--expand your horizons and decrease costs at the pump!  More information can be found at http://www.massbike.org/mbpv/bikeweek/index.html.  And even if you don't have a bike, you should take a walk on the beautiful bike trail!

 

As many of you may know, Amherst was blessed long ago with the protection and guidance of the river goddess Sabrina. In 1857 the governor of Massachusetts bestowed a bronze statue of the water nymph upon the College on the Hill, and since that time she has excited generations of Amherst students, inspiring legendary battles between odd year classes and even year classes over her custody. During one year, she was dangled over the campus in a plane; another year, she was held out of a passing train, causing athletes to drop their equipment in the middle of a baseball game and charge after the elusive statue.

Sabrina's ventures, however, were recently halted. Several years ago, she was returned to the College administration, who hid her away in dark and secret location, bringing her into daylight for only the occasional class reunion. This neglect has no doubt saddened our fair protectress, and even worse, we fear she has begun to slip from the collective memory of Amherst undergraduates. You will surely agree that she hardly deserves such a fate, and so we are certain that you will be excited by the news we bring today:

SABRINA HAS BEEN LIBERATED!

sabrina

Some time ago, a few of your fellow classmates crept into a bunker, hidden in the mountains around our valley, and absconded the beautiful goddess. We cannot, of course, disclose our identities just yet, nor can we display Sabrina publicly, for fear that the administrative forces of the College will work fervently to repossess her. (Although, really, it wouldn't disappoint us if they recognize the fun of this tradition and let us off the hook...) We can, however, tell you that we are members of the class of an even year class, and that Sabrina is currently in our safekeeping.

Sabrina has matured with the times, and she now has her own Facebook account and blog! Please friend her on Facebook (though she is currently held by the even year classes--or 'Es--she is happy to be friends with 'Os as well).

Finally, as some of you may know, many years ago Sabrina was cruelly decapitated at the hands of pranksters among the Williams Ephs. Although her head was reattached by a subsequent Amherst class, the scars are still apparent, and her head is loosening once more. Therefore Sabrina will be traveling throughout the Northeast during senior week, visiting alums from 'E classes, and posing with them in photos in exchange for a small donation toward the Sabrina Recapitation Fund. This summer we will use those funds to give Sabrina the healing treatment she deserves at the hands of a professional bronze craftsman. Stay tuned for updates!

Posted on behalf of Sabrina, Goddess of Amherst, class of 'E.



FLICS
A whole new year. A whole a new semester. A whole new FLICS schedule! To find out what movies will be screened at the Campus Center theater throughout the coming months, check out the FLICS website. This weekend THERE WILL BE BLOOD is the feature film.

 


  menu for valentine today  
Breakfast Menu not available.
Lunch Menu not available.
Dinner Menu not available.


  your news  

  what's happening on campus  
  submit an announcement or event

On Campus : Sorry. no events available for today.

  what's happening off campus  
TODAY
7:30 pm
Songs in the Soda Shop (Concert) - 225 Main St. Leeds MA 01053
Corinne West and the Posse play Northampton, Friday, May 16th
Tomorrow
4 pm
Writers in Progress (Reading) - Writers in Progress, Studio #359, Arts & Industry Building, 221 Pine Street, Florence, MA 01062
Annual Spring Reading and Open House
Sunday
2 pm
The Suzuki Talent Education Partnership (STEP) (Dance) - Faith United Church, 52 Sumner Ave. in Springfield, MA
19th annual Suzuki String Serenade
Jun 10
7:30 pm
Django in June (Concert) - Helen Hills Chapel at Smith College
"Gypsy Jazz"

 
In our forum...
Grade Inflation

Exceptional Seniors

In Jobs...
Oakland Teaching Fellows: Become a Teacher. Oakland Teaching Fellows


"Have I thrown a damper on romance? I certainly hope so!"
--Professor Parker: Literary History and/as Media History

Got a great professor quote? Send it to us!



  quick poll  
The new facebook chat is...
Convenient
Annoying
Creepy

36 Local Menus


* this restaurant delivers

  in the marketplace  
1 recent listing in VEHICLES
3 recent listings in MISCELLANEOUS
1 recent listing in SERVICES
» more listings...

Sponsored Links

iChapters
Save up to 65% on Textbooks.

CourseReviews
Your chance to do the grading.

Spring Break Direct
Great deals on Spring Break Trips!

QuadRiot
Procrastination for the People!





Erika Pettersen '08, Jen Romanowicz '09, Anne Morrow '10 and Matthew Lewis '10.




About Project Jolt   |   Go to Another Campus   |   Start a Jolt   |   Advertise   |   JoltCamps

Contact Us   |   Privacy Policy   |   The page, the look... heck, even you. It's all Copyright © 2008, The Daily Jolt.